Some classify Toronto as a world-class city like New York, London, Paris, Berlin, Tokyo. It might make ranking lists, but for people living here, it is often alienating, lonely and isolating.
I’ve visited Toronto a few times and found it’s multi cultural nature seemed to be searching for an identity. When we filmed Bogus there I stayed for about a month and got to know it’s vibe more. You are right, it’s very much like many American cities.
Except in my view, I found Americans to generally be warm and friendly, as well as helpful. I have not travelled much in the last few years, so unless much of America has changed in that way, I find that Toronto lacks that openness that many Americans have. And I have visited a good part of America.
Hooray for Americans! For me Chicago has always been a very friendly city and in Canada my very favorite city is Ottawa! It’s so beautiful and magical. I stayed there for about a month performing at a fair. I thought the people were mostly outgoing and friendly.
Perhaps it's a bit like the story of the elephant and the blind man; it depends where you are standing, and what part of the beast you touch. Slightly more than half of the 6 million people in the Greater Toronto Area have been born outside of Canada. Happily, my Toronto is full of contact with immigrants from various cultures, people who are not so stingy with their hellos and warm smiles.
Perry I remember reading a quote once from Tennessee Williams that speaks volumes about American cities: “America has only three cities: New York, San Francisco, and New Orleans. Everywhere else is Cleveland.” I couldn't agree more. I live here in Mexico City and I'm happy to say there definitely is a unique vibe you can only get here that isn't present in other American cities. BUT there are problems with housing, gentrification, water availability, the fact the city is sinking every year, and the fact that the infrastructure is a bit faulty (I write this from the 4th floor of a building that is literally swaying from either wind, tractor trailers going by, or mini tremors. I have no idea which one it is. Ahh, Mexico City. Lol.
I have never been to Mexico, but I sense that Mexico is generally a friendly place, including Mexico City. I say this because I have found Latin cultures friendly. I also suspect the food is fantastic and the architecture beautiful.
Hey Perry, we definitely need more pieces like this. Having only visited Toronto, it was quite interesting to read your account as a resident there. I think it is quite unfortunate as Toronto definitely has the potential to be a lot more than it is.
I sometimes wonder if there is some greater effect that is happening in Ontario, at least with regard to the unaffordability of Toronto. I was truly astounded to even see the rising prices of property in Ottawa. I actually lived there for nearly 30 years. Now as an independent content creator, I certainly don't make a lot of money and I could never afford to live in my home town, not even if I were exceptionally frugal.
Not that I necessarily want to go back to Ottawa, as I'd rather live in a smaller city anyway (which I can luckily still afford), but I think it's a funny aspect of modern culture that even if you theoretically contribute a great deal of good to society (I am virtually certainly I improve the world more than when I was a programmer making a lot more), I cannot even consider my home town much of a home simply because I'd have to be rich to afford it!
In other times and other places it'd be a lot different: most land would not be owned and if you wanted to return to your tribe, you could. It just goes to show how eroded local communities have become.
Going back to your topic of Toronto: yes, I do feel for you and I do hope things can be improved. With such a large city, who knows? But writing about it is certainly a good start.
Writing about it is cathartic, to be sure. There is, even in urban Toronto, the birds and the squirrels, who bring much enjoyment and beauty to the world, or at least my world. As does my companion cockatiel, Arya. It was nice chatting with you.
Cafe culture appeals to me and it is what I have been used to in Montreal, with its Latin roots, and sitting around a table socializing without any real purpose than socializing. While work is taken seriously, so is eating and discussion in Montreal.
When I was a sales engineer, many years ago, it was expected to take our clients out to lunch and talk about things other than business. Lunch often took more than an hour. I guess I miss those days.
Portugal seems lovely and friendly and a town of 10 to 15 K is large enough to have all the essentials.
A lot of what you say regarding housing is applicable in the U.K, as is the 'no-real-serious-discussion' about it all. Here in Portugal the two biggest cities (Lisbon - 3 million inhabitants. Porto - 1.3 million) make up 40% of the population. Otherwise, cities are 'manageable' to walk around with café culture making them friendly - as are the people. It's considered rude in the countryside where we live, not to acknowledge people. I tend to dislike cities personally, hence living in small village rural area of Portugal (local towns 10-15K inhabitants).
I understand what you are saying about the American comparisons, especially the expense/high cost of living in certain places. That’s what got me displaced from the SF Bay Area in 2020. I made the move back to where I grew up in Oregon, but the same issues of inequality keep going.
Yes, that is the problem that no one really wants to talk about. If income can't keep up with inflation or the cost of living, and despite everyone working hard, people have been going or will go deeper into debt.
That just increases stress and mental-health issues. This is not good for society. Thank goodness I have Arya keeping me sane along with the outside birds and squirrels and any other non-human animals I meet.
Even so, I wish there was a switch to turn off corporate greed.
You're confirming my biases as a west coaster towards Toronto. I've never had the desire to even visit. I've heard that it's very cosmopolitan and diverse, and that at least sounds good.
This sounds like a very sad place, which never feels like home. No, it doesn't read like 'sour grapes'. Having never been to Toronto (or Canada) I appreciate the personal review.
You are right. Some places are just 'unfriendly' in the sense of not conducive to making friends. We lived in such a place before moving to Portugal. We thought it was just us, but heard later that many people felt the same. Portugal is amazing in terms of friendliness of people. That's one of the main reasons we chose this country. People here are still connected to their heart. I think that makes all the difference.
You are right in your analysis: soul sickness. York, North Yorkshire sounds lovely. Squirrels and probably lots of birds and friendly people who don't mind saying a word or two.
I hope you get to return to Montreal. You've described a depth of soul-sickness, malaise, in the energy of Toronto that can't be healthy for you. Come visit York, North Yorkshire! A very different vibe and a city rooted in antiquity with plenty of squirrels in the Museum Gardens to make you smile.
Excellent essay Perry. I have similar feelings about Toronto from the periphery. Except for 3 years living in Victoria Park area of Toronto, I lived just beyond the edges of the 905 area in Peterborough and later St. Catherines.
Toronto at first was attractive simply for the money and opportunity - especially after graduating university. Funny enough though, I ended up in Ottawa. Although, Ottawa is hardly an exciting or world-class city in so many respects, it's about the size of the city I like. After a decade in burbs of Seoul South Korea as well, I definitely needed a place smaller and less dense than Toronto!
I have visited Montreal many times and did spend a summer at the University of Montreal studying French many decades ago. Montreal has a vibe and the way people carry themselves is different than Toronto. I cannot place it exactly, but I do like it.
I’ve visited Toronto a few times and found it’s multi cultural nature seemed to be searching for an identity. When we filmed Bogus there I stayed for about a month and got to know it’s vibe more. You are right, it’s very much like many American cities.
Except in my view, I found Americans to generally be warm and friendly, as well as helpful. I have not travelled much in the last few years, so unless much of America has changed in that way, I find that Toronto lacks that openness that many Americans have. And I have visited a good part of America.
Hooray for Americans! For me Chicago has always been a very friendly city and in Canada my very favorite city is Ottawa! It’s so beautiful and magical. I stayed there for about a month performing at a fair. I thought the people were mostly outgoing and friendly.
Perhaps it's a bit like the story of the elephant and the blind man; it depends where you are standing, and what part of the beast you touch. Slightly more than half of the 6 million people in the Greater Toronto Area have been born outside of Canada. Happily, my Toronto is full of contact with immigrants from various cultures, people who are not so stingy with their hellos and warm smiles.
Perry I remember reading a quote once from Tennessee Williams that speaks volumes about American cities: “America has only three cities: New York, San Francisco, and New Orleans. Everywhere else is Cleveland.” I couldn't agree more. I live here in Mexico City and I'm happy to say there definitely is a unique vibe you can only get here that isn't present in other American cities. BUT there are problems with housing, gentrification, water availability, the fact the city is sinking every year, and the fact that the infrastructure is a bit faulty (I write this from the 4th floor of a building that is literally swaying from either wind, tractor trailers going by, or mini tremors. I have no idea which one it is. Ahh, Mexico City. Lol.
I have never been to Mexico, but I sense that Mexico is generally a friendly place, including Mexico City. I say this because I have found Latin cultures friendly. I also suspect the food is fantastic and the architecture beautiful.
Hey Perry, we definitely need more pieces like this. Having only visited Toronto, it was quite interesting to read your account as a resident there. I think it is quite unfortunate as Toronto definitely has the potential to be a lot more than it is.
I sometimes wonder if there is some greater effect that is happening in Ontario, at least with regard to the unaffordability of Toronto. I was truly astounded to even see the rising prices of property in Ottawa. I actually lived there for nearly 30 years. Now as an independent content creator, I certainly don't make a lot of money and I could never afford to live in my home town, not even if I were exceptionally frugal.
Not that I necessarily want to go back to Ottawa, as I'd rather live in a smaller city anyway (which I can luckily still afford), but I think it's a funny aspect of modern culture that even if you theoretically contribute a great deal of good to society (I am virtually certainly I improve the world more than when I was a programmer making a lot more), I cannot even consider my home town much of a home simply because I'd have to be rich to afford it!
In other times and other places it'd be a lot different: most land would not be owned and if you wanted to return to your tribe, you could. It just goes to show how eroded local communities have become.
Going back to your topic of Toronto: yes, I do feel for you and I do hope things can be improved. With such a large city, who knows? But writing about it is certainly a good start.
Writing about it is cathartic, to be sure. There is, even in urban Toronto, the birds and the squirrels, who bring much enjoyment and beauty to the world, or at least my world. As does my companion cockatiel, Arya. It was nice chatting with you.
Cafe culture appeals to me and it is what I have been used to in Montreal, with its Latin roots, and sitting around a table socializing without any real purpose than socializing. While work is taken seriously, so is eating and discussion in Montreal.
When I was a sales engineer, many years ago, it was expected to take our clients out to lunch and talk about things other than business. Lunch often took more than an hour. I guess I miss those days.
Portugal seems lovely and friendly and a town of 10 to 15 K is large enough to have all the essentials.
A lot of what you say regarding housing is applicable in the U.K, as is the 'no-real-serious-discussion' about it all. Here in Portugal the two biggest cities (Lisbon - 3 million inhabitants. Porto - 1.3 million) make up 40% of the population. Otherwise, cities are 'manageable' to walk around with café culture making them friendly - as are the people. It's considered rude in the countryside where we live, not to acknowledge people. I tend to dislike cities personally, hence living in small village rural area of Portugal (local towns 10-15K inhabitants).
I understand what you are saying about the American comparisons, especially the expense/high cost of living in certain places. That’s what got me displaced from the SF Bay Area in 2020. I made the move back to where I grew up in Oregon, but the same issues of inequality keep going.
Yes, that is the problem that no one really wants to talk about. If income can't keep up with inflation or the cost of living, and despite everyone working hard, people have been going or will go deeper into debt.
That just increases stress and mental-health issues. This is not good for society. Thank goodness I have Arya keeping me sane along with the outside birds and squirrels and any other non-human animals I meet.
Even so, I wish there was a switch to turn off corporate greed.
You're confirming my biases as a west coaster towards Toronto. I've never had the desire to even visit. I've heard that it's very cosmopolitan and diverse, and that at least sounds good.
It might be, but mostly it is a city that is highly materialistic and devoid of soul.
This sounds like a very sad place, which never feels like home. No, it doesn't read like 'sour grapes'. Having never been to Toronto (or Canada) I appreciate the personal review.
You are right. Some places are just 'unfriendly' in the sense of not conducive to making friends. We lived in such a place before moving to Portugal. We thought it was just us, but heard later that many people felt the same. Portugal is amazing in terms of friendliness of people. That's one of the main reasons we chose this country. People here are still connected to their heart. I think that makes all the difference.
Yes, Toronto is a sad place.
I heard good reports about Portugal, and the Portuguese that I met in Montreal were all warm-hearted and hospitable.
You are right in your analysis: soul sickness. York, North Yorkshire sounds lovely. Squirrels and probably lots of birds and friendly people who don't mind saying a word or two.
Absolutely, friendly people.
I hope you get to return to Montreal. You've described a depth of soul-sickness, malaise, in the energy of Toronto that can't be healthy for you. Come visit York, North Yorkshire! A very different vibe and a city rooted in antiquity with plenty of squirrels in the Museum Gardens to make you smile.
Excellent essay Perry. I have similar feelings about Toronto from the periphery. Except for 3 years living in Victoria Park area of Toronto, I lived just beyond the edges of the 905 area in Peterborough and later St. Catherines.
Toronto at first was attractive simply for the money and opportunity - especially after graduating university. Funny enough though, I ended up in Ottawa. Although, Ottawa is hardly an exciting or world-class city in so many respects, it's about the size of the city I like. After a decade in burbs of Seoul South Korea as well, I definitely needed a place smaller and less dense than Toronto!
I have visited Montreal many times and did spend a summer at the University of Montreal studying French many decades ago. Montreal has a vibe and the way people carry themselves is different than Toronto. I cannot place it exactly, but I do like it.
Thanks Neil for your insights. I like Ottawa; it is nothing like Toronto, and its proximity to Hull and Montreal helps.
That's right; Montreal has a vibe. Less materialism is one reason an ability to laugh is another.